SO FAR SO GOOD.. .

...HOLDING MY BREATH

I was given the first chemo of my new phase - herceptin - this past Wednesday; it's Saturday and I am feeling fine. With the previous Chemo, I would be suffering by now. 

Dr. Cohen told me I  was "one tough broad" as we talked after chemo. Our conversation was about my limitations with herceptin (for me,  none! ) and follow up care in regards to my kidneys and bladder. She assured me that I would be feeling better in about 6 months and I  told her that,  although, I had my days I never,  really,  felt that bad. She smiled and made the comment about me being tough and then went on to give the example of the kidney issue/bleeding and my calm, matter-of-fact demeaner while dealing with it. I work,  I hike,  ride horses,  walk, run up steps, laugh, and live each day to the fullest as I am able. I know how fortunate I am to be doing so well. That's, exactly, the reason why I push myself beyond what my body is telling me. I am so blessed. It may be my imagination,  but,  it seems the pitted scar on my forehead (from neulasta) is healing. The hair on my head is growing; I have a good stubble going. I am, still, tired, but, not as debilitated. 

I bought a bottle of green vegetable drink last week and have been drinking a glass every morning. I follow it with ensure. This seems to be keeping my digestion and intestinal track running smoothly. My sleep is,  still,  disturbed. I wake up sweating and my heart racing; typical of nightmares but I don't remember the bad dream,  if that's what wakes me. My short term memory isn't great,  yet. I don't fret so much so long as it's not severe. 

Work has been stressful but I  put that on myself . My standards for myself are higher than what anyone has put on me. I need to, constantly, remind myself to calm down. Lenny has been an awesome friend and our friendship continues to flourish and surprise me with depth! I am grateful beyond words! Without the beautiful relationships established in the workplace the job would be colorless. God bless my friendships.

You know that little cloud with rain drops over your head....

"IT'S JUST BAD LUCK!"

 

That's the word, so far, after seeing Dr. Sender, urologist. I called the Porter Ranch clinic and made an appointment to see Dr. Cohen today; my urine was still as red as a stop sign. Once in the office I started cramping. Diarrhea! Really?, I asked myself. I grabbed a specimen cup and filled what I could. Dr. Cohen was so sweet. She apologized for the situation and told me that, in spite of everything, I still looked good - just pale and tired. We discussed the weekend and how I was feeling. She told me she was of the opinion that it was kidney stones. I told her of my past experiences with stones and other urinary system issues. She arranged for me to see a urologist in Newhall, by the Henry Mayo Hospital (so I would be close to home) and set me up in a chair to receive hydration and anti-nausea. My blood work came back good with the white blood cells 'low' but, that is to be expected since this is the time, after chemo, that they are at their lowest. Nothing else alarming in the results. About 2 hours later I was ready to go to Newhall and see the urologist. Joe brought the explorer to Porter Ranch and picked up the Saturn. His day was filled with a funeral and memorial service for the father of former shipmate. He returned just in time to trade cars with me.

 

I waited to see Dr. Sender for a couple of hours but it was worth the wait. His office is nondescript and, sort of, shabby, really. He seemed a bit disheveled in a handsome way and had a very approachable demeanor. Of course, none of that matter if he turns out to be a quack. Thankfully, he wasn't. We talked about my health history, surgeries, chemo and my current issue. He took me to a room and performed an ultrasound on both kidneys and my bladder. The right kidney has a 9.2 mm calcium stone and 3 other smaller objects (probably stones, as well). The left kidney has a 3 mm cyst in it. There is no swelling or indication that there was a uric acid stone present or had passed. If there were, that would indicate it was chemo related/created. Dr. Sender explained the breakdown of cells during chemo and how this can become the uric acid stone. Luckily, that's not happening. Dr. Sender said, "It's just bad luck!" With my history of stones, etc. now's as good a time as any to have this happen. Then, he made the comment "ya know that little cloud that follows you around above your head..." and I replied "Yes!" It's been like that the whole time! He made me chuckle a couple of times and put his hand on my shoulder when we were exiting and shared some words of encouragement. Tomorrow I will call Tower Imaging and make an appointment for a CT Scan for Dr. Sender. Then, we'll know, for sure, what is going on in the kidneys and bladder.

 

By the time I got home I was so weak and shaking. Not much to drink and nothing to eat all day. And, I was still nauseous. I made chicken noodle soup and plopped on the couch.

 

I can't explain the drop in blood pressure today, though. It was 121/80 in Porter Ranch and at Dr. Sender's, 115/77. Usually, it's 149/88 or something similar.

 

I'm not going in to work tomorrow. I don't feel horrible about it, either!



My urine around noon today as I collected a sample at Porter Ranch